A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words!Man, I love these kids!
Showing posts with label Adoption. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Adoption. Show all posts
Friday, November 21, 2008
Adoption Shower Pics
These are some of my dear friends, who hosted an Adoption Shower for our family recently. The kids all had so much fun, we had an inflatable obstacle course and an inflatable bounce house for them, so the parents could enjoy their time together! This was a very special day for our family. Thank you, sweet friends!
Deflating the bounce house
Foosball & Air Hockey Champions
Thanks again, friends, for a wonderful memory!!!
Thursday, November 20, 2008
It's Official!!!
Today, we went to court and finalized our adoption of Wendy, Angel and Dora!!! Yay!!! By Texas law, we had to wait six months from the date the girls came home. It seems like we've waited forever!!! We had a great time, and the judge was very nice and commented about how lucky we all were and how beautiful & sweet the kids all are. I pray the kids will all be able to cement this day into their memories.Mema and Poppie met us for the special day, and they brought roses for everyone! Then, after the hearing was finished (which was about 20 minutes after we entered the courtroom, even though we were fourth on the list), they treated us to breakfast at a local restaurant! Thanks, Mema and Poppie, for making our special day even better!
A special "Thank you" to my sweet friend Janet, who brought cupcakes to the gymnastics gym today, so all of our friends could celebrate with us! Thank you, Sweet Friend!
The pictures below were taken before the hearing - you can tell they are excited but a bit nervous and sleepy! I had to wake them up at 6 to get to court on time. If you know us, then you know this is absolutely unheard of. But, we got to watch a beautiful sunrise as we drove to the courthouse!
Thank you, Lord Jesus, that you are good, and your love endures forever! (1 Chronicles 16:34)
Thank you that you set the lonely in families. (Psalm 68:6)
Thank you that you bind up, and heal, the broken-hearted. (Isaiah 61:1, Psalm 147:3)
Thank you that you bind up, and heal, the broken-hearted. (Isaiah 61:1, Psalm 147:3)
Thank you that you are able to do immeasurably more than we could ever ask or imagine. (Ephesians 3:20)
I leave you with our family Bible passage. This is our continuous prayer for our children. And today it is also my prayer for you.
"For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom his whole family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." (Ephesians 3:14-21)
Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." (Ephesians 3:14-21)
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Belated Adoption Update
I'm so sorry it has taken so long for me to update. As it turns out, going from 3 kids to 6 is a bit more work than you might think! We are finally getting the hang of the whole 6 kids thing, and I can finally stop to breathe, I mean, post an update!
Short version: Adoption is extremely difficult but it is such a blessing already!
Long version: We have spent the last several weeks getting to know each other. The first couple of weeks, especially, were very difficult. The new kids were adjusting to a new family & new rules, and testing the boundaries. The old kids were adjusting to their space being constantly invaded and learning that their expectations about adoption just didn't match the reality. They did not anticipate the developmental delays of their newly adopted siblings, and were often shocked, disgusted and annoyed with the misbehavior/immaturity of their new sisters.
After a few weeks, however, we got to know each other better. The girls found things they could all enjoy playing together. They became used to each other. The new girls became more comfortable and no longer shut down or went into crying/screaming fits. The old girls' annoyance is certainly not gone completely, but they are able to enjoy their new sisters, rather than just put up with them. They don't seem to feel resentment towards the new girls, just annoyance that they won't hurry and Grow Up So We Can All Be Real Sisters. They are impatient for the fun part, the wonderful sisterly bonding, to start. And, truly, it has begun, it just isn't progressing as quickly as Padme & Lil Yoda wished & expected. The Lord is teaching us many things through this experience, chief among them Patience.
I believe that the new girls' shutting down and crying/screaming fits stopped largely because we got to know them better. Because they are developmentally delayed, we really have to treat them like they are 3, 4 & 5 instead of 6, 7 & 9. They have never been taught to communicate effectively. Like toddlers, they would cry or throw fits instead of speak. As we have gotten to know them better, we parent them better. We are able to anticipate what they want or need or what they are trying to express, and teach them to express themselves effectively. We have been working very hard on improving communication skills and have seen great progress. Now that they are able to express themselves verbally, they do not need to shut down, cry or scream.
One issue we did not anticipate is that the new girls did not respect or, really, love each other. Therefore, getting new sisters was not something they necessarily looked forward to! The old girls, however, love each other dearly and expected to gain 3 more sisters who felt the same. Because the new girls were so needy, they just viewed their sisters as competition - someone who might get the attention they so desperately needed themselves.
In the past few weeks, we have been teaching the girls that Sisters Are Treasures. This has helped immensely, as the girls are learning to love & respect their sisters. This has helped my old girls as well who, because of the way their new sisters initially behaved & treated them, did not see them as treasures either.
The new girls are jealous of the relationship the old girls have with each other. I think it's a good jealousy, though. In that relationship, they see what they really want. Hopefully, in time, they will all be very close. I have been told this will take a couple of years, and that's okay. As long as I continue to see regular progress, I am happy.
In summary, our life is loud, complicated, funny, confusing, silly, frustrating, exhilirating, exhausting, and sometimes we don't know which way is up. Our house is filled to the brim with love, laughter and hairbrushes. We praise the Lord every day for this blessing called Adoption. How did we ever live without these girls? Thank you, thank you, Lord Jesus.
Short version: Adoption is extremely difficult but it is such a blessing already!
Long version: We have spent the last several weeks getting to know each other. The first couple of weeks, especially, were very difficult. The new kids were adjusting to a new family & new rules, and testing the boundaries. The old kids were adjusting to their space being constantly invaded and learning that their expectations about adoption just didn't match the reality. They did not anticipate the developmental delays of their newly adopted siblings, and were often shocked, disgusted and annoyed with the misbehavior/immaturity of their new sisters.
After a few weeks, however, we got to know each other better. The girls found things they could all enjoy playing together. They became used to each other. The new girls became more comfortable and no longer shut down or went into crying/screaming fits. The old girls' annoyance is certainly not gone completely, but they are able to enjoy their new sisters, rather than just put up with them. They don't seem to feel resentment towards the new girls, just annoyance that they won't hurry and Grow Up So We Can All Be Real Sisters. They are impatient for the fun part, the wonderful sisterly bonding, to start. And, truly, it has begun, it just isn't progressing as quickly as Padme & Lil Yoda wished & expected. The Lord is teaching us many things through this experience, chief among them Patience.
I believe that the new girls' shutting down and crying/screaming fits stopped largely because we got to know them better. Because they are developmentally delayed, we really have to treat them like they are 3, 4 & 5 instead of 6, 7 & 9. They have never been taught to communicate effectively. Like toddlers, they would cry or throw fits instead of speak. As we have gotten to know them better, we parent them better. We are able to anticipate what they want or need or what they are trying to express, and teach them to express themselves effectively. We have been working very hard on improving communication skills and have seen great progress. Now that they are able to express themselves verbally, they do not need to shut down, cry or scream.
We significantly underestimated the significance of the fact that we really don't know these children. This makes parenting very difficult. We have been with, or at least near, our bio children almost every second of their lives. We know nearly every experience they have ever had. Except with the teenager. He is old enough to have private places where even Mom & Dad don't belong. We understand the way God made them and what makes them tick. We know what motivates them, what frustrates them, what brings them the most joy and what they fear. Adopting children is like starting a book at chapters 6, 7 & 8. We have missed so much critical information, and we don't really even know what we missed. The beginning of a good book will set the stage for the story to come, introduce the characters and make you fall in love with them. By the time we even found the book, the first few chapters had been ripped out and thrown away, leaving us with a very complicated story but no background or introductory information.
Without a basic knowledge of these kids, it is very difficult to know the way they each should go. So how can we train them in that way? We must lean very heavily on the Lord to guide us as we train these children. He created them, He knows their inmost beings, He knows what way they should go and the most effective way to train them. We did not anticipate the magnitude of the impact made by the simple fact that we have missed so many years of our new children's lives. It sometimes makes me want to cry, thinking of all that we have missed, how many years of their lives could have been better with us, how many things we could have protected them from. But the Lord knows what He is doing, and He loves my children even more than I do...
As they have grown more comfortable in their new family, their obedience also has improved. We rarely have disobedience problems now, whereas we had issues all day long for the first few weeks. Our primary concern, though, is that we get not just outward obedience but their hearts as well. Deep down, we know the fear of disruption (fancy adoption lingo for sending the kids back) is possible. They know the system very well, and I know in the back of their little minds they are counting down the days until the Six Months' probation period is up, and the adoption is Finally Finalized. Until then, I don't think they'll allow themselves to truly let down their safeguards.
One issue we did not anticipate is that the new girls did not respect or, really, love each other. Therefore, getting new sisters was not something they necessarily looked forward to! The old girls, however, love each other dearly and expected to gain 3 more sisters who felt the same. Because the new girls were so needy, they just viewed their sisters as competition - someone who might get the attention they so desperately needed themselves.
In the past few weeks, we have been teaching the girls that Sisters Are Treasures. This has helped immensely, as the girls are learning to love & respect their sisters. This has helped my old girls as well who, because of the way their new sisters initially behaved & treated them, did not see them as treasures either.
The new girls are jealous of the relationship the old girls have with each other. I think it's a good jealousy, though. In that relationship, they see what they really want. Hopefully, in time, they will all be very close. I have been told this will take a couple of years, and that's okay. As long as I continue to see regular progress, I am happy.
In summary, our life is loud, complicated, funny, confusing, silly, frustrating, exhilirating, exhausting, and sometimes we don't know which way is up. Our house is filled to the brim with love, laughter and hairbrushes. We praise the Lord every day for this blessing called Adoption. How did we ever live without these girls? Thank you, thank you, Lord Jesus.
Friday, May 30, 2008
Monday, May 26, 2008
Killer Wheels
Pictionary. It seems like a fairly simple game. You read the card, pick something to draw, and your team guesses what you drew. Easy, right? Not so at our house tonight. Our new daughters have little to no exposure to family games, or family time at all, for that matter. There is definitely a learning curve involved!
To be fair, it's often difficult to tell what the younger kids are drawing. That's why we make sure an adult is on each team, to help with the guessing when the drawings are difficult to decipher. And, sometimes, those who haven't yet developed good reading skills need help reading the card. Fine. No big deal.
So we played Pictionary tonight. Padme went first - she drew a globe and Greenland. No problem. Then Lil Yoda went - she drew a fairly decent looking washing machine, but ran out of time so we never guessed it.
On Angel's turn, she first asked if she could just draw the design that was on the back of the card. At that point I told Baloo, "I thought you guys explained this game to the new kids!" He returned, "We thought we did!"
We explained that, no, she must read the card, then draw one of the objects listed on the card. She drew a lovely sailboat, all the while saying, "It's an object! It's an object!" We guessed it and applauded her. Then, she returned her card to Daddy, who pointed out that sailboat was not, in fact, on her card and she couldn't just randomly pick something to draw. Pretty funny, but probably a common mistake.
When Dora's turn came up, she asked Baloo to help her read the card. She decided what to draw and began. She drew a circle, then scribbled all around it and over it. "I'm done!" she announced, then turned around, expecting us to know immediately what she had drawn. We had no clue. We convinced her to draw it a different way. This time, she drew a circle, and cut it into pie slices. Again, the scribble all around it. We gave up. She wouldn't let us give up, and kept scribbling around it. Finally, she looked at us like we were idiots and said, "Killer Wheel! See the wheel and the fire all around it?"
What?
Baloo, at this point, was rofl, and informed us that the card actually read, "Killer Whale."
To be fair, it's often difficult to tell what the younger kids are drawing. That's why we make sure an adult is on each team, to help with the guessing when the drawings are difficult to decipher. And, sometimes, those who haven't yet developed good reading skills need help reading the card. Fine. No big deal.
So we played Pictionary tonight. Padme went first - she drew a globe and Greenland. No problem. Then Lil Yoda went - she drew a fairly decent looking washing machine, but ran out of time so we never guessed it.
On Angel's turn, she first asked if she could just draw the design that was on the back of the card. At that point I told Baloo, "I thought you guys explained this game to the new kids!" He returned, "We thought we did!"
We explained that, no, she must read the card, then draw one of the objects listed on the card. She drew a lovely sailboat, all the while saying, "It's an object! It's an object!" We guessed it and applauded her. Then, she returned her card to Daddy, who pointed out that sailboat was not, in fact, on her card and she couldn't just randomly pick something to draw. Pretty funny, but probably a common mistake.
When Dora's turn came up, she asked Baloo to help her read the card. She decided what to draw and began. She drew a circle, then scribbled all around it and over it. "I'm done!" she announced, then turned around, expecting us to know immediately what she had drawn. We had no clue. We convinced her to draw it a different way. This time, she drew a circle, and cut it into pie slices. Again, the scribble all around it. We gave up. She wouldn't let us give up, and kept scribbling around it. Finally, she looked at us like we were idiots and said, "Killer Wheel! See the wheel and the fire all around it?"
What?
Baloo, at this point, was rofl, and informed us that the card actually read, "Killer Whale."
Mema and Poppie's House
I have received questions about the Adoption Announcement picture. We are on the porch swing at Mema and Poppie's house. We went to their house for Mother's Day, our first weekend with our new girls. Here are a few more pictures from that day.
Baloo, 14 11/12.
Padme, 9 1/2.
Wendy, 8 3/4.
Angel, 7.
Dora, 6.
Poppa, Mema and the kids. Ages omitted.
Fun with our new sisters
Here are a few pictures from our first few days with our new sisters. The kids are all learning to get along well. It took them a few days to get to know each other well enough to find things they could all enjoy playing together, and now they really have fun with each other. The new girls are extremely smart, but developmentally delayed, so Padme and Lil Yoda had to adjust their expectations a bit. Now that we all understand each other better, we are able to play pretty well.
Manicures and pedicures with The Queen-to-Be and Grandma Lori. Papa Sparky, Grandma Lori, The Queen-to-Be, The Wacky Prince and The Chef came over to meet the girls, and to celebrate The Queen-to-Be and The Wacky Prince's birthdays last month. We had a great day, grilling out, playing outside, playing video games and painting nails.
We don't know what Lil Yoda was doing with her tongue. And I'm pretty sure that's her own foot. Wendy is just smilin' and looking' cute!
Aren't Big Sisters great? Padme is painting little flowers on Dora's nails.
That's Grandma Lori, the one that doesn't look like a grandma. :)
Dora wanted me to take a picture of her two Barbie heads. They really didn't bring much stuff, but she loves these Barbie heads!
We love to make our own pizzas! Everyone gets to make their own, just as they like it. The new girls don't have any experience at all in the kitchen, so they get very excited when they get to cook! Notice the jar near Padme, she likes alfredo on her pizza.
Daddy is the best dough pounder. Angel was covered head-to-foot in flour by the time we finished! We have learned it's best for her to bathe after meals, rather than before!
Dora has a natural pounding instinct. She is very determined and wants to be self-sufficient. She would not accept anyone's help. Even though it took her longer, she got it done! We love her hard-working, never-give-up spirit!Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Adoption Announcement
We would like to introduce you all to our new sisters! However they are, as yet, nameless. Well, they do have names, but I forgot to have them create cybernames. So, you will have to be happy with their ages & descriptions for now.
We have been praying and waiting for these children for ever so long. We always knew our family was not yet complete. We know the Lord set aside these precious souls just for us, and we couldn't be more thrilled!
I have not yet blogged about the girls, because I wanted to wait until I had met them. We started this process in February of 07, went to training in June 07, did our homestudy in November 07 and were approved in Jan 08. Within just a few weeks, we were asked to adopt three precious little girls! The Lord orchestrated everything in His perfect timing, and we have seen His hand throughout this process. We are stepping out in faith by adding three at once, but we know the Lord will equip us for what He asks of us!
This weekend, we finally got to meet our new daughters, and they stayed the weekend with us! Now we want to share them with you!
Our new 8yo dd (far right in the picture) is intelligent, friendly and quiet. We were unable to produce a quiet child through biological means, but have always envied those who could. So, we adopted one. She is a thinker, and living life at a slower pace allows her to really notices things that most people would overlook. She is on the A/B Honor Roll at school, and wants us to know she gets 100s on all her math and spelling tests! She loves to help people, especially her new Mama!
The second dd is 7 yo (far left in the picture), and is a bundle of energy. This daughter reminds me of Lil Yoda, in that she keeps us all in stitches. There will never be a dull moment with these two together under the same roof! This daughter jokes and laughs and has an infectious smile. She is easygoing and easy to please, and she loves to eat as much as Lil Yoda! She and her sisters enjoyed helping cook dinner, while they were here this weekend. She told me she put extra love in it for us!
Our new youngest daughter is 6yo (second from the right in the picture). She is a little charmer, and will steal your heart the moment you meet her. She is very smart and has a heart that wants to please. She also likes to help her Mama with things around the house. She showed me her school folder, and she got a smiley face every day this month for good behavior! I may need to start a smiley face chart at home! This one is my little tomato (thanks, Ginger!) and I look forward to having her by my side for the next few weeks!
I know this is getting long, and I will have the rest of their lives to write about them, so I'll wrap this up now. We will have them again this weekend, and then they come home for good the following weekend! Thank you, Lord, for the blessing of children! What a wonderful Mother's Day weekend!
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
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